As a working mum I sometimes find myself feeling really
quite guilty for not spending more time with my Children, on the odd occasion
that I finish work early to pick one of them up from School or Nursery I quite
often look at the mums at the school gate with a little bit of envy.
Both my Son and Daughter went into full time nursery from an
early age so that I could get back to full time work.
Working with Charlie was not something I had a choice in
really, I was at the time a young single mother and I needed to work to provide
for myself and Charlie.
When Alyssia was born I put her into Nursery full time from
7 weeks as I was working towards my directorship and I could not afford to take
that break in my career at the time.
A lot of people have said to me in the past “why have
children if you don’t spend time with them” and I find this hurtful, I also
however almost see where they are coming from. For me the main reason that I
work is to provide a future for them, I want to be able to provide them with a
nice home, I want them to be able to do all of their hobbies that they love
like Swimming and Riding, to me that is also an important part of being a
parent – providing for them.
I always say to my husband that I wish to make enough money
so that my children can do a job for love not for money, I would like to be in
a position where I can give them a really good head start in life so that money
is not such a pressure for them as it is to a lot of young adults.
I try to spend as much time with them as I can, I see them
every evening and weekends are dedicated to them. As you can see from this
picture even when I work in the evenings I make sure that they are close to me
so that I can still speak with them about their days and engage with them.
I have been really lucky over the years with how supportive
both of the children are with my work, they never make me feel guilty for not
being at home more, they never moan about their long days in Nursery, School and
before and after school club.
My Son who is now 11 often asks me what I am doing when I
work in the evenings, he has a real interest in the business that I work for
and I like that, I think this installs a good work ethic in him.
When I was growing up both of my parents worked full time
and both me and my brother had before and after school care, I don’t think it
did us any harm.
I have so much respect for every parent out there and I don’t
think we should judge, if you are able to take a break in your career and raise
your children at home then I think that is amazing for you, if you decide to
work whilst also raising a family then again that is amazing for you too.
Every person is different and things in life mean different
things to different people. If I won the lottery tomorrow would I be able to
spend more time with my children? Of course I would but right now that hasn’t happened
so I will continue to work in the way that I am so that my little muffins can
have the best start we can give them.
Both my husband and I are working our little butts off at
the moment, I am working hard for my directorship and my husband has recently
opened his own electrical company.
One day things will be a little easier and we won’t be
spinning so many plates but I think secretly we both enjoy the hustle and bustle
of it all.
I would love to know peoples thoughts on this, do you
support both working parents and stay at home parents? Have you been a mother
(or father) who has battled with guilt for working lots?
Thoughts welcome from all.
Zoe
x
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